I have been asked a few times how do I cope with stress/ bad days?
I have always told people when they have asked me this question; ‘by the grace of God is how I Cope’
We all have bad days sometimes right? We all have those days when no one wants to listen! We all have those days when everyone wants the same pen or toy! We all have those days where the kids are fighting with one another! We all have those days where the kids stole something from the fridge! We all have those days when the kids want to see who can shout the loudest! I mean the list is endless of all the things that could go pear-shaped!
As you know we are a very busy household, there is 11 of us in our house, and I admit that sometimes it can get a little crazy! Although the children are very well behaved, we do however have those bad days just like anyone else. We also have to remember that our children see, and hear everything, and how you react in that moment of stress is very important! It’s no use shouting ! which I am sure we have all done right? But I try to first find out what the problem is? and why it happened? and once we are clear on that we come up with a suitable solution. Sounds easier said than done right? But it’s true!
Although we are only human and have our bad days, I find that something simple like smiling shows the children that my mum is strong and she has got this! and she can do anything! Even if you don’t want to smile it’s still important to do it.
For me personally, the power of prayer is incredibly important. Faith is a very important part my life, and with Gods guidance, gets me through my days.
Also When I Feel stressed I like to make a coffee, or a cup of tea and head out in the garden for a few minutes for some fresh air, and sometimes I like to walk up and down the garden too. I just say to the kids ” mummy is just going outside for a minute” When I’m outside I take a few deep breaths, pray a prayer, and tell my self ‘you can do this’ It is also amazing what fresh air can do! Once I have done this I am ready to come back it and start afresh.
When my husband is home on the weekends I sometimes like to take myself out shopping for a few hours. It is very important to have that time to yourself
Remember to always allow yourself a little break every now and then. Remember to always smile and hug your kids, and lastly remember that you are an awesome mum!
Writing these blog posts for you all over the last few months have been absolutely amazing. Id love to tell you why I started it all in the first place, and what my goals are for the future with it all.
I have always wanted to start a blog but I have always doubted myself and thought I couldn’t do it. I am a busy homeschooling mum, but I really wanted to start a blog and had pondered on the idea for so long. In June of this year, I finally took the plunge and created my website “thistribeofmine.com” I honestly feel it’s one of the best things I have done, and my writing has improved immensely. I feel I have grown so much already. I never realized how much I enjoyed writing either but it’s been absolutely amazing talking about our journey as a family of 11. I have actually had my facebook blog and Instagram since 2015 but didn’t update it very often, but now having it all linked together has helped me so much with it all. The more social platforms you have, then the more places you can advertise and promote your blogs to others. It’s all a working progress and I absolutely love it.
Do it because you are passionate about it
I started this blog because I wanted to do something for me, I love my life with my husband and children, and I feel absolutely blessed, but being a stay at home mum of 9 children living in a rural town, I wanted to make one of my hobbies become a reality. I started my blog because I honestly love writing and sharing our family journey. I have received so many lovely comments and messages from people which have been so lovely and it makes more driven and passionate about what I do.
Don’t start it with high expectations, or for the wrong reasons
I feel sometimes people start blogs/ Instagram and expect to do collaborations and be paid for writing blog posts almost straight away. I believe you should start a blog first and make sure to enjoy what you do. Choose a free blog platform first and see if it is for you? Then later look at the premium options. If you are not passionate about writing then don’t do it. Start your blog for the right reasons only. It takes a long time to do collaborations and be paid to write blog posts for others etc.. I have personally done a few collaborations so far, but through my Instagram only, and I am currently am not paid to write these blog posts for you. I have ads on my blog but have not made any money from them as of yet. I take this time out of my busy schedule once a week to write something for you all because I just love to sharing my journey with you. I am passionate about writing and I hope that shows? Obviously, it would be a bonus to be paid a small income from it all but it really isn’t about the money for me. When I have spoken to some very big bloggers they told me it actually took them 1-2 years to establish themselves and to be able to work from home as a mum blogger. Its okay to set yourself goals, I of course have set myself goals but I am in no rush. I am just going with the flow and enjoying every minute of it!
My goals for the future is to continue to reach out to as many people as possible and continue to share my journey with you. I want to help change peoples opinions on large families and talk about how you can balance it all, and that it is possible to budget well. I want to share how you can still have a timeout with your loved ones. I have so much I want to share with you all and I’m honestly so excited to continue this journey with you all! I have so much more I want to share with you and I have so many blog ideas.
Thank you for all your love and continued support on everything that I do!
I wanted to let you all know that a year ago today my dear grandad passed away. I cannot believe that a whole year has passed already? But not a day went by where I wasn’t thinking of him. I miss him dearly
It is never easy losing a loved one. My family live overseas and I was not able to travel to England while he was sick, or when he passed away because I was heavily pregnant at that time. I do wish I could have been there one last time to hold his hand and tell him how much I loved him.
My grandad had been unwell since the beginning of last year, but an actual diagnosis did not come until the end of September of last year where they confirmed it to be liver cancer, and sadly two weeks after his diagnoses my dear grandad passed away.
The same weekend my grandfather passed away I had been away with my husband and children for a short weekend break to celebrate my husband’s birthday. The whole time I was away I had that constant sinking feeling but still tried to remain positive.
On the afternoon of the 7th of October, we were sitting on the verandah at the holiday house when a beautiful kookaburra flew down to us and perched himself on the edge of the verandah. He looked at us curiously. We were able to get really close to him and feed him and even stroke him. He stayed with us for ages. I had that sinking feeling again. Could this have been a goodbye from my grandad? You see, my grandad was a lover of birds and an avid bird watcher, he knew so much about birds and growing up he used to teach me a lot about them. The bird eventually flew away but I had been so amazed by what had just occurred. Never have I seen a bird of that kind be so tame. I have spoken to people who had similar experiences after a loved one passes away.
This picture here is the actual kookaburra that came to visit us ^
My grandad had sadly passed away on the 7th October 2017, but I did not find out until my husbands birthday on the 8th October due to travelling back from the coast, and the time difference, but also my family decided they didn’t want to tell me until I had got back home from holiday, I of course totally understand that but I felt like I already knew and I had been preparing myself to hear those dreaded words; I’m so sorry Claire, but unfortunately grandad passed away’ I mean no one is ever ready for those words, but he was getting weaker and weaker and I just knew it would be sooner rather than later.
When I got home on the 8th I had a tearful conversation with my mum and my heart sank. I have never really lost a loved one that is so close to me before. I just felt numb when she told me. I just wanted to be there and hug everyone and I felt sad that I couldn’t. I cried so much that night and husband hugged me tightly. It has taken me a very long time to be at peace with it all and on this sad anniversary I can’t help but feel so sad again, I do however try to think of all the happy memories I had with him growing up. We really had so many happy times as a family and I will never forget them.
Before my grandad died I had written him a personal letter with some family photos which I know read to him before he passed away. We also made sure to tell him that we found out we were having a boy after 8 girls. He was thrilled for us. I am so glad he was able to read my letter, but I still wish I could have been there to tell him how much I loved him in person. One thing that still breaks my heart every day is that my grandad in the last week of his life was so desperate to video call me on skype, but sadly he never got the chance to do that.
I am in regular contact with my grandma. I always phone her as much as I can to see if she is okay. I think my grandmother is an amazing woman with how she has coped with it all. I am in awe of her courage and strength. I feel the same about my mother too she is also very much like my grandmother and has shown strength and courage in what has been a very difficult year for us all.
I am very sad today but I am also thinking about all those wonderful happy memories and I think it is the best way to remember someone.
Here are some words for my grandad;
Dear Grandad – A year ago today;
A year ago today you left us. I know that I am far away but I have been thinking of you every day. Today I feel so sad and I am trying to be strong
I wished I had got the chance to say goodbye, hold your hand and tell you that I loved you,
Sadly it wasn’t to be.
and I still cry because I miss you so much
I have been remembering all the happy times that we shared
In sad times like these, I think it is important to think of all the happy times. Grandad, I’m so sorry that I was not there to say one last goodbye
I’m so sad that your gone,
But I know I must get on.
I feel so very sad today.
I truly hope I get to see you again one day.
I love you dear grandad
Life is so precious and so short, so, please
Tell your loved ones, how much you care. Hug them tightly and kiss them and cherish every waking moment with your family. You get one shot at life, so spend it telling others how much you love and appreciate them.
Thank you for reading my sad blog post today. I ask you all to pray for my grandad’s soul with this prayer;
Eternal rest, grant unto him, O LORD. And let perpetual light shine upon him and may he rest in peace. Amen
Back in June 2006, I was just a normal 19-year-old girl living at home with my parents and working fulltime. I decided I wasn’t earning enough money and decided I would start a second-weekend job. That was when I met Mark. He was on a 1-year hiatus from Australia as his family home had burnt down in a house fire. Unfortunately, they had lost everything! To tell you the truth though we actually had our first encounter a few weeks prior to that as I had gone to that particular bar with my friends most weekends, and actually the funny thing is, that one night I was out dancing with my friends when a mutual friend came over and was rather cheeky and said, ‘see my mate here he really likes the look of you! I was like, ‘umm okay go away! How rude of me right?! But this particular “friend” was always cheeky with the things he said. Fast forward to a few weeks later and I had started working at the same bar and that was when I got to know Mark, and I really thought he was lovely. He was always so kind and taught me everything I needed to know about working in a fast-paced bar. He always offered to drive me home after work even though he lived completely the opposite way!
Our First Date
We really go to know one another, and I had butterflies in my belly every time I thought about him. One day I texted Mark and said, ‘I really like you! so cheesy right?! But I just had to tell him! A few days later we planned our first date which was at Southend. We spent the day at the beach and going to the arcades and we went on all the rides, and A little while later we had dinner together. It was such a beautiful day that we shared. After dinner, we sat on a dock, partly stretch out into the ocean. We sat there for what felt like hours, dipping our feet into the warm summer moonlight water and talking about all sorts of things.
We shared many more dates together and I think we both knew from early on that it was love at first sight! It didn’t take us long to say ‘I love you’
Mark Goes to Egypt
About 3 months after we met we were on a night out at the bar where we both worked. Actually, at that point, I had stopped working at the bar as the late nights were impacting my day job. We were having such a lovely time then Mark said I have something to tell you. Mark then said he had decided to go and visit his parents in Cairo Egypt and would stay for about 3 months. About a week later he was gone, and I was devastated. We stayed in contact through phone and email and I longed for the time when Mark would be back.
Mark Goes to Australia
After Mark returned from Egypt he started working at another bar. Mark had said he had to go back to Australia and go back to his job. He asked me if I would like to go with him too? I, of course, didn’t want to be without him and I said yes! I knew it was a big life change for me But I was so excited for the journey ahead with the man that I loved so much. Just before my 20th birthday, we went out for dinner with both our families and that was when Mark turned to me in front of everyone with a beautiful ring and asked me to marry him! I obviously was shocked but said yes instantly! We had our engagement party on the 30th December 2006, and sadly the next day was when Mark had to make his travels back to Australia, I couldn’t go just yet as I was organizing my visa and flight. I was so upset saying goodbye! I knew it would be at least 3-4 weeks before I would see him again. I was also so sick with a chest infection that day he left too which made me feel even more miserable! I spent the next few weeks recovering from illness and organizing everything for my departure. I thought it was best to keep myself busy.
I go to Australia
The day came when it was time to leave for Australia. I felt anxious and excited at the same time, and I obviously felt sad because I was leaving my family to start a new life on the other side of the world! We said our tearful goodbyes and off I went. When I saw how big the plane was I started to feel really anxious and burst into tears and funnily enough, I got to board the plane with mothers and children because of how freaked out I was. The journey ahead was long but pleasant. I had spent 7 hours in Singapore waiting for the changeover. I arrived in Australia on Australia day 2007.
When I first arrived in Australia from England I had no idea what the future would bring and I was excited for the journey ahead.
The day that I arrived I was so tired as I had not slept the whole entire flight. Mark had taken me out for dinner and we celebrated my arrival.
Married and the Future
On May 12th 2007 we were married. It was a beautiful day surrounded by many beautiful friends, but unfortunately, no family could travel at that time. We honeymooned in Sydney and had an amazing time. One year later we had our first baby! life was beautiful. Fast forward to now in 2018, and we love each other more than ever! We have 9 beautiful children under 12 years old, 8 girls and 1 boy and I Feel I am so blessed to live in this amazing country, with an amazing husband and our children.
I don’t know what the future holds, but I will cherish every moment with my beautiful family!